This free script provided by
since so many people are a fan of my insults, i’ve made a curse-free insult generator at the request of a very enthusiastic anon
here u go, bud
YOU REPULSIVE CELERY STICK.
you are such a sordid pumpkin seed I s2g
YOU INCONGRUOUS KNITTING NEEDLE
when you’re at home alone and you hear something moving
those songs that start in one earbud and flow into the next
that moment in a concert where all the instruments stop and its just the singer and everyone around you and you don’t know like ninety percent of the people in the room but you all know the lyrics and you all know what that band has done for you and oh my god you realise that you’re surrounded by people you don’t know but you share at least one interest with each other and you feel like a family yeah you know that moment i live for that moment
long-distance friendships are terrible because you can’t meet up with them whenever you want and hang out on any given day which is why when i’m president i’m relocating the entire human population into a 10,000,000 story skyscraper that also acts as a bridge from earth to the moon which comes with the added benefit of swinging the moon around like a fucking mace, god damn it’s gonna look so cool. what was i talking about
concert looks: anything that will make the girl next to you feel threatened and will get you laid by your fave band member
T h e m o c k i n g j a y L I V E S
Marrying young is not the end of my freedom. It means I want to travel and see the world, but with her by my side. It means I still like drinking in bars and dancing in clubs, but stumbling home with her at 2am and eating pizza in our underwear. It means I know that I want to kiss those lips every morning, and every night before bed. If you see marriage as the end of your ‘freedom’, you’re doing it wrong.
You can’t go to the pharmacy without someone saying, “Hey, you’re the girl from Harry Potter!” and I’m like “Yeah! Just buying tampons, see you in a bit!”